Reality

Reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or might be imagined. This fits perfectly for me today and I will explain why during this entry.

Everyday here so far has been like a dream. I have enjoyed being her and words a lot of the time cant express what I am seeing or feeling. Today when I woke up I just felt a little down.  I was still a little bothered by my negative interaction with Stephen the night before. I  also couldn't stop thinking of a conversation I had with one of the other volunteers. We were talking about all of the people who had helped us get here and how a lot of them didn't have a lot of money themselves but helped anyway. We shouldve stopped there and just been thankful because we are truly thankful and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for all the help I received.  The conversation didn't end though, it then turned to some of the people who didn't help us. This has been a touchy subject for me for awhile. I felt hurt by some of what I thought were my closest friends and some of my spouses family that I felt like would've or could've helped but didn't. Bringing back these feelings was a bad idea. I tried to put these feelings behind me and continue with my day.

I was in the medical group today and we set up the "medical care center" in the church. We have different station.

Station one: check in and get blood pressure

Station two: take off the old bandages

Station three: feet washing

Station four: oil feet

Station five: cutting dead skin and redressing the wounds

The living conditions of this colony were more heartbreaking than any of the colonies I have seen .. We arrived and this colony looked nothing like the others I had been to. Half of the houses where made out of branches and old poster/billboards or sheets.

                                       

                 This is not laundry hanging these are a few houses that are right next to each other.

                                     This home was made at of an old plastic billboard sign

                             Plastic, cloth, old metal door this house had a combination of things

                                                     Blankets  and branches

                                      This was the nicest home in the colony and it had a TV

 There where only 4 people that needed bandages which was great and the sores didn't look as bad as they did at the other colony. The last guy that we had come through had dead skin/ulcers that needed cut out. This was heart wrenching because this was very painful he was gripping his leg and had tears rolling down his face. I wanted to shout stop you're hurting him. I wanted to tell him I was sorry and ask what I could do to make it better.  I couldn't so I just had to sit there and touch his leg and hand to try to show I cared and I was sorry. I was frustrated that the nurse wasn't talking to him or doing something for the pain.

 This is the man I am referring to. After I re bandaged his foot I asked for a picture. He leaned his head against mine it was so sweet.

On the drive back I was still thinking about the negative things and then I added the sadness of feeling like I hadn't done enough to help this man. When we got to the Hostile I went to my room and started blogging and reflecting on my day so far. I came across a few quotes that helped put things into perspective.

Spread love everywhere you go: let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your smile, kindness in your eyes. -Mother Theresa

Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth.
Muhammad Ali

To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.
Douglas Adams

If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
Mother Teresa

With all of the miracles and amazing people I am surrounded by and for all the people that helped to get me here how can I be down? I am so blessed to be here. I am so lucky to have a great family. Yea so I didn't get the support I thought, who cares.  They are the ones missing out on this journey.  I have a wonderful husband who is a shining example of service.  I don't know where he learned it but he is an inspiration to me and my children. My family has been so willing to support me in every way possible. I have friends that provided more for me to get here then they should have. I am in India learning more about selflessness and love from these people that have so little but are willing to share everything they do have with you.

I am truly blessed and so thankful to be here.  I am learning so much about India/Me/Family/God. Reality is what you make.

Tonight at Family time we made more wallets the kids had a blast.

                                             Here are some of the boys getting ready for bed!

           Tonight ended great it started raining and Amy, Kim and I went and played in it!

There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.                                    Albert Einstein

Fourth Day Construction Day

Construction Day!

The first four people in this picture are the people I spend most of my time with. We are broke up into three groups. Our group is called the Cobras. When we go out to do medical, construction or education these are the people I go with. The next person in the picture is Danny he is the one I mentioned in a previous post that is leaving to go on his mission to Delhi. The last person is Kim she is the one over constructions so everyday she does construction. She is amazing because I found it is exhausting to do construction for one day let alone everyday all summer.

Last night I only got 4 maybe 5 hours of sleep but I feel pretty good so I hope that continues. I took a lot of pictures of the colony today. I am so intrigued by the different houses. All of these houses are within two blocks of each other but how different they all are. 

                          They hand wash there clothes and hang them all over there homes to dry.

                  I love the bright colors of some of the homes and places of worship its so beautiful.

                                                   

                                      Here are a couple of businesses

                                          This is a carpenters shop                                               

This store has food and candy

I always catch myself staring as people walk by with objects on there heads from bags of grain, wood, or pots full with water.

Such a variety of animals you can see.

Cows are everywhere.

There are s many stray dogs here

This is the lizard that has been living in our room

Today in Construction we hauled the cement rings for the septic tanks they are building. After we hauled them to the hole we had to lower them in. I felt bad because one of the guys got his finger smashed and needed stitches. I was glad Danny was there to help us translate because that did help us and made the experience even more enjoyable.

Something so simple in the USA was made so hard here. You can't just have a tractor come dig the hole and a cement truck pour the cement. There are large and small things I take for granted everyday.

We went to the store after construction and bought treats. We were all like little kids picking out our treats to buy. In the bus we all exchanged treats!

Playtime was great. I went to dance class for the first time with some of the kids. They are wonderful dancers. I will have to post a video of them.

We had talents in family night tonight.  I taught the kids how to make wallets (Thanks Tabitha for showing me how).  They loved it and each child made two or three. Had a very rough night with Stephen again. He is needing attention or something but he is being very destructive trying to get it. I hope I can figure out a way to reach him....

Introductions, Medical and Education

I am going to start with a quote I heard that I think couldn't be more fitting for the situation.

I've come to believe that there exists in the universe something I call "The Physics of The Quest" - a force of nature governed by laws as real as the laws gravity or momentum. And the rule of Quest Physics maybe goes like this: "If you are brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting (which can be anything from your house to your bitter old resentments) and set out on a truth-seeking journey (either externally or internally), and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue, and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher, and if you are prepared - most of all - to face (and forgive) some very difficult realities about yourself....then truth will not be withheld from you." Or so I've come to believe." Elizabeth Gilbert

I am hoping  today to get caught up on my experiences here so far. I feel like then I wont have to worry about forgetting details I wanted to share if I can just catch up.

Day 1 at Rising Star

The first day at Rising Star was very hard because I was so tired. I met the children and got to play for hours with them because they didn't have school because of some holiday. Some of the children were shy but most weren't. I quickly found they want your attention but even more they are interested in the objects you have with you. I happened to bring my camera bag that day so the children spent alot of time asking to take pictures and seeing the pictures.

After playing with the kids we came back and ate dinner. The food here just tastes hot so to me doesn't feel like it really has a taste because the hot overwhelms it.  After dinner we go to family time.

There are two of us assigned to each family. There is a house mom and about 12-16 kids per house. By house it is three small rooms that the house mom and children share. The family I get to join is the Kala family. The age of the children in this family range from 5-13. My house mom who is the only adult in the home is very sweet. She gave me a beautiful anklet that she put on me. I played with the younger boys and then read them a book I had brought from home. This is when the reality started to really kick in. The book I brought was called I LOVE YOU. I had little boys from age 5-9 climbing all over me and two 5 year olds that really just wanted to turn the pages. At this point I must tell you I almost lost control of my emotions. I realized the amazing, adorable children don't have there moms to read to them. They will spend 11 months out of the year away from there parents, if they have parents which from what I understand some do not. Then I finished the story and it was bedtime. The youngest children laid down on a mat that was on the cement floor in a line one after another and that is how they went to sleep. I stared at these little boys falling asleep without there parents without blankets or pillows or beds and just couldn't digest it.

Day 2 at Rising Star

Today is the first real day at rising star. Got up took a bucket shower (which actually wasn't as bad as I had anticipated) and then got into my Cudidar. I love these by the way it is like wearing PJ's all day but more flashy. 

I was on the medical rotation and those of you following my blog saw the pictures. The Colony we went to hadn't had treatment from Rising Star before, but had received help from elsewhere in the past. This particular colony  only had single older adults there. I got assigned to do foot washing which I was nervous about. This was one of the most humbling experiences I have ever had. The pain these people must live in is unimaginable. Some of these people didn't have very many sores but had severe disfigurement from having the Leprosy before they got treated. Others had severe disfigurement but were still suffering with ulcers on there hands and feet. After washing there feet they wait in line to get re bandaged. There was one guy who his whole foot was missing the first few layers of skin and really looked like he should be in the hospital. He was hitting his foot with a paper to try and keep the ants and flies off of it. I went and asked Kim if we could move him to the front of the line because he seemed to really be in pain and needed to get bandages back on immediately. In the meantime, Amy went and sat in front of this man and shooed the flies away so he didn't have to worry about it while he waited. This moment was priceless and one I wont ever forget.

I had two ladies that lived in this particular colony that touched me deeply. One of them was missing her one leg and most of her other foot she did have all of her fingers which was rare at least in this colony. I couldn't understand the language she was speaking, but her jesters made me think she was speaking about god and about her disease. She tried multiple times to tell me the same thing and then she just cried and touched my face and held my hands. What I would give to know what she was trying to tell me. I had another lady who was missing all of her fingers and just had a little left of her hands. She also kept showing me her hands and telling me from what I could gather about her hands and them being gone. She kept hugging me and she had the an smile that just spoke a million words to your heart.  I uploaded pictures of these ladies in the blog post previous to this. The second lady I am speaking of is in a green dress and has red and white on her forehead. The first is in a purple dress sitting on the ground. 

At playtime today I learned how tiring the swings can be. The kids had me push them and I spent over an hour and finally I gave into the heat and told them I needed a break. At Family time Stephen one of the older boys who is like 12 asked me to play connect four which was awesome because the night before he wasn't that nice to me. Later that night he we had a pillow fight and he wouldn't stop hitting me with the pillow so I guess I am back to square one. I had the same experience as the first night with the little boys, overwhelming feelings of sadness for these children. After my experience in the colony I know they are better off here. I know here they are getting an education and in a safe clean environment but I am still sad that this is how it has to be.

Day 3 at Rising Star

Today I was in the school for Education. I tutored 5 kids and it was a great experience to help them with Reading and Math. Some of the kids really needed the help and some of them I think just get bored and don't want to do the work. One of the kids I tutored was learning long division and I couldn't remember long division so I had to have Amy show me sad but true. Theetihi (pronounced like TearTea) didn't want to do long division she wanted me to do it. I wouldn't and by the end she wasn't happy with me. I thought for sure she wouldn't be talking to me anytime soon. At recess she wrote on a leaf I love you and I want to meet your family. I put this lea in my journal. Another boy I tutored named Vijay (pronounced like VeeJay) didn't want to do his reading and and assignments. The day before one of the girls mentioned how hard it was to try and get him to do his work. I struck a deal with him that if he did his work and quickly I would let him take pictures with my camera. He was the first one done!

                                                    This is morning line up.

                                                    This is Vijay

                                       Love the saying on the wall in the library

I went to lunch with the children today at the school and what an interesting experience. I couldn't help but to watch them eat. They all said "Auntie Auntie come sit with me" but I had already promised Theetihig  I would sit with her.

                        Everyone sits in a circle on the floor for lunch time no utensils are needed.

Playtime today was exhausting. The kids decided today that they want to play catch me which is like tag except they want you to tag them and they want to tag you but they don't want to tag any of the other kids. Its like playing 12 different games of tag or more depending on how many kids want to play. I had another touching moment from Steven. He came up to me and said "I went to the doctor and got to get some treats which one do you want?" I told him "no thank you they are yours so keep them". He insisted I take one so he gave me some bubble gum. How sweet is that? I have decided he acts tough but that's just protecting himself, really he just wants attention like any other kid.

Family time was the very best so far. I got a book from Derek called I knew I could. I will be buying this book when I get home. Here is a  couple paragraphs from the book that fits so well to the situation.

I knew you could! And you knew it too--- That you'd come out on top after all you've been through. And from here you'll go farther and see brand-new sights. You'll face brand-new hills that rise to new heights. I wish I could show you the stops that you'll visit, But that isn't my choice to make for you, is it? Instead, I can tell you some lessons and tales That I've learned and relearned in my time on the rails.

The kids loved it and had me read it over and over. Carl (who is the other person assigned to my family) and I laid down with the kids and read them this story we each had 3 or 4 kids laying on each of us. Our house mom fell asleep on the floor which is very unusual because she usually is going 90 miles and hour. 

Our house mom has 2 boys who both just returned from the USA where they where able to go to school. They have only been home for 2 months and they are both leaving. One boy left this morning to go on his mission and her other son leaves in 2 weeks. The sacrifices some families make here are so incredible.

A couple things that I find so neat here.

The people I’ve met in India are so quick to love and give. Even though most of these people have very little they are still willing to give you what they have.